Realityicide

by Owen Duff

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1.
02:45
2.
02:43
3.
03:24
4.
03:24
5.
02:53
6.
7.

about

“I don’t want to die, I want to kill the way things are”. This seven song cycle expresses a dissatisfaction with the everyday realities of life, death, the world and the relationships between the people in it, and an intense yearning for an escape to something or somewhere better –through dreams, fictions and other unrealities.

Six of the songs presented in the EP were extracted from Owen Duff’s project ’20 Two Minutes 4 Weeks’, a set of 20 songs written and recorded in the space of a month. Remixed, re-recorded, expanded and re-arranged, the songs from that project are now presented in a coherent and lush soundscape of woodwind, guitar, piano, percussion and violins, with hints of modern electronica and vintage echo.

credits

released 28 November 2011
All songs written and performed by Owen Duff. Woodwind on 'The Race' and 'Realityicide' performed by Craig White. Drums on 'Dying for the Money' by Shay Godwin at www.edrumsessions.com.

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about

Owen Duff London, UK

Owen Duff sings, plays piano, guitar, ukulele and percussion; writes, records, produces and makes videos. Since 2009 Owen has been hiding his music in cities around the world, bringing together his love of music, conceptual art, immersive theatre and Paul Auster novels. His next release will be the EP 'Realityicide' in winter 2011. ... more

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Track Name: The Race
We are worried for your health
We fear you have damaged yourself
For what else
But the race?
The race
For the race
For the race
Well I saw you out crawling to the crashing sea
You were out walking with the elderly
You were running out of money
Running out of time
Driving yourself to the end of the line
Well the candle in your heart wasn’t strong enough
Your torch-bulb blew, the weather was rough
Then the light-house did it, lit your destiny
And it only showed you where you didn’t want to be
In the race
In the race
In the race
Track Name: Codebreaker
The role of controller I never gave over to you
And I spy the codebreaker covertly collecting the clues
Trying to find the key
The combination by which you would master me

You sense an aversion to anger and angry you get
And a friend who fears tears will find you regularly upset
As victim you appear
While expertly you dominate by fear

I know why you need the whole world to be under your thumb
If not at your command you could be abandoned by anyone
It’s a game I’ve played too
Never as often or as well as you

I’m sorry for what made you so tough
I’m sorry
But not sorry enough
Track Name: Realityicide
I don’t want to die
I want to kill the way things are
Any way I spin it
There’s no way to win it
There’s no money in it
Who cares, who cares, who cares?

On the wall a fly
Waits to see what happens next
As I make appointments
With profound disappointment
Gainful employment
Oh no, oh no, oh no

I’ll find a pit in which to sit
Some gloomy nook to read my books
Not for me, gay Paree
Sunny Spain
On a ‘plane

Oh, I don’t want to die
(Who cares?)
Track Name: Fail
Would you have learned to walk
If you’d given up the first time you fell down?
Would you be able to talk
If you’d been afraid to make a foolish sound?
And yet you expect to be perfect
At everything the first time around now
Well come on, come on, come on, come on and
Fail with
Come on and fail with
Come on fail with me

There is who you are
And there is what you do
Keep them apart
Don’t let yourself get them confused
‘Cos if doing well is what makes you yourself
You’ll be destroyed each time you lose
So come on, come on, come on, come on and
Fail with
Come on set sail
And sink with me
Track Name: Volcanoes
Our self-centred chatter
Bored me to the core
Too scared to say so
I sat for hours more

Thinking of the sea
Tides turning internally
Imagining beauty
Unreality

Our heads are like planets
Red-hot under skulls
Speaking like volcanoes
Makes life wonderful

But you remain remote
Our flow is disrupted
Still inside I hope
Uninterrupted
Track Name: Taking the Line for a Walk
Hands so handsome
Fingers meet thumb
Wood encircling lead
Draw out the thread
The path I tread

You make a drawing
I may go walking
Crack of bracken, trees roar in sun
Then come undone
Timber!
Mankind mulches, bleaches and cuts
Roots underfoot
Paths paper white
So bright
Pencil marks
Sully
Into
Night
Track Name: Dying for the Money (Bonus Track)
So fucking bored
Trapped in a box heading for the 7th floor
The most basic thoughts
Crawling up the steeple, promoted ‘til they are all chairmen of the board
Once I slept on the floor of a train
From Paris to Venice and again
On the deck of a ferry where I howled “hallelujah” out into the rain
So why am I wasting my life
For the money, money, money, money?
Not living, I’m dying for the money

I heard a chord
Outside of the window an angel I saw
And up he soared
Rang a bell for me, but I had to take a call
I thought of ‘planes and towers and Birkenau
Thought where fate can take you and how
Your luck can change quickly so if you’re gonna do somehting you better do it now
And yet I’m here, year after year still fearing
No money, money, money, money
Not living, I’m dying for the money

A siren’s shriek
Was dragging my life out and down onto the street
The mast too weak
I called my angel, prayed that my falling didn’t mean defeat
In dreams I pulled the false gods from the sky
Pulled them down to Earth to ask them why
The world they created keeps me trapped in a box and makes the angels cry
Those dreams that free me
I see sold straight back to me
For the money, money, money, money
Not living, I’m dying for the money